All Deprivation Is Inevitably Yo-Yo Dieting
It’s noon on a Saturday, and I’ve barely thought of food at all. As I sit here typing at Starbucks, there is a banana and lemon-loaf rested on my table. I also ordered a medium decaf, iced Americano with vanilla sweet cream and 1 raw sugar. The coffee is almost gone, the lemon loaf is half-eaten. I’ll get to the banana – maybe. Forgetting to eat a meal or just nibbling on food kinda just happens, overtime, when you stop depriving yourself.
But when I’m hungry, and I sit down to eat, boy do I enjoy myself! The flavors, textures and variety – all bring me a sense of pleasure I never thought possible. I like to sit down, take my time, chew my food and really savor the moment. I reach for the highest quality items I can find. Fresh-baked bread and pastries, organic fruits and veggies, amazing pasta dishes from the Italian grocery down the street. Full-fat dressings made from scratch. I want and deserve the best when it comes to my food. And the higher the quality, the less I tend to eat.
What We Resist – Persists
What we resist, persists. The same goes for food. Resist all animal products, and watch how you begin to dream of ice cream. Deny yourself of desserts, only to find yourself binging at Christmas parties. Put yourself on a calorie-restricted diet, and get ready for some form of mental insanity via disordered eating.
Our bodies weren’t meant to go without large food groups, occasional desserts or adequate calories. Our biology is smart, and when we deny ourselves of what God has given for our pleasure, our bodies fight back. Weight gain, a slowed metabolism, newfound health issues and eating disorders – these are just a few of the ways the body attempts to restore equilibrium.
What We Focus On – Expands
What we focus on, expands. The same goes for our weight. Nothing has made me fatter than dieting and a focus on my fat. Being obsessed with how fat I am, how fat clothes make me look, how fat I look in pictures, how fat I am compared to my younger self, how fat I am compared to the other women around me – all this negative focus turned me into a fat-producing machine. So if you want to stop the ever increasing number on the scale, stop focusing on it. I recommend throwing scales out completely – forever.
Throw Out The Scale – Forever
I don’t weigh myself because it’s pointless and a surefire trigger right back into the world of yo-yo dieting. The number on the scale loses it’s value once we learn that weight has little to do with overall health. We’ve been brainwashed to believe it does, but the reality is there are just as many sick thin people as sick fat people. And chubby old ladies often outlive thin ones. Skinny dudes get cancer, just as much as fat ones. I could go on and on. Bottom line, I see health as a mindset and lifestyle – not a weight.
I haven’t weighed myself in over a year. Last I checked I was 230. I imagine I’m still 230 but who the hell knows? Who the hell cares. I’m healthier than I’ve ever been, despite my weight. I don’t have an eating disorder anymore, my medical numbers (cholesterol, blood pressure, blood sugar, etc.) are all within the normal range, and I feel more beautiful than I’ve ever felt in my life. Looks like plus size isn’t a death sentence, after all. 🙂
Intuitive Eating Restored My Life
When I gave up dieting I gained my life back. It wasn’t overnight, but rather, a slow, steady distance between myself and calorie-restriction. This took place over the span of 7 years. It was hard in the beginning because I had a severe addiction to food and selfhate, but each year that passed got a little easier. So if you’re looking for an overnight fix, my method isn’t for you. But if you’re looking for a longterm healing – you may have met your match.
A far cry from the teen that obsessed over food, counted every calorie, binged on In N Out, feared going on dates [because she knew she had to eat] and settled for guys she wasn’t attracted to. I am no longer the girl that ate in the shower stall, hid candy in her desk and threw-up after parties. I am now a far cry from the young lady that hated every inch of herself and thought she deserved death, hate and a shit-life for being overweight.
Thank you, God – I am not that girl anymore.
My latest bodylove & style vid:
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